30 September 2008

let the fog roll in

The heat has reared it's ugly head again and it's monstrous. Someone told me that the seasons change in his heart - that's because we live in LA and every season is the same. I'm sorry, but fuck this 90 degree weather we're having. It makes me cranky. It makes me lazy. Last night we took a late night walk and it was still hot out! I'm losing my mind...

It must be the heat but I'm feeling pretty crappy of late. You ever get to that point where you're done trying? You try so hard each and every day that it's gotta come to an end eventually. Or someone's gotta start giving you something back to help refuel maybe.

I know I can be bitchy - I am not necessarily a bitch but yes, I am bitchy. But I come to work every day with a pretty damn good attitude and I know it's my job to make other people's lives just that much easier. Well then, quit bitching! Give me a little something to work with here. It's tough for me too you know. We choose to be here so suck it up!

And I may be a bit selfish at times but I am a damn good girlfriend. Show me that it matters, that I matter. I want to feel the adoration every single fucking day - I know it's hard work but nothing comes easy. We're a team and we've gotta keep practicing to stay in this game.

Here's where I need to put in some major work of my own (I'm not afraid to admit it); spending time outside of my cocoon. If I step forward and start making this effort then I want you to do the same. Let's not say we're going to do a Sunday dinner and then never do it. Let's actually run that next 5k and have those drinks and get that dinner. My first step - yes, I am going to play coed touch football with you Friend J. I have signed up, paid my $75 and I am committed damn it! So the rest of you commit and let's have some fun already.

Phew, that felt good... sorry to be so bitchy but it's this heat I'm telling you.


Daniel Vasey said...

Darling, everybody needs to have a bitchy-nutty once-in-a-while. No apologies! It sounds like you need me in LA LA land to bring ur shit down to center. Keep your eyes posted for a gig at ur company...I've got 7 more months in granola land and then I'm outta here. I've got to go coastal. My fab has been in the bag for waaayyyy too long. I'm sending you fairy sparkles. Sprinkle urself with them and feel the love!


the girL said...

I am SO in need of fairy sparkles right now - you're the best! Love you